I’m researching potty books and DVDs online. On Amazon, I come across a cute book called Does a Pig Flush? WHY is this book $73.96?!?! Does someone from the publishing company come to your house and potty train your child for you? If so, then it might be worth the price tag. OK, it would definitely be worth the price tag. (Hey, maybe I could start my own business: We Wipe for You) Is this a typo? After looking at this listing three separate times and trying to figure out what I was missing, I finally see (in small type) that there is a paperback version available for $5.95. That, I might consider.
Archive for March, 2007
No Words
Sometimes I rail against the forces that brought me to be living the life that I am. Sometimes I get so angry for having to do all of these jobs. Sometimes I am ungrateful and ugly. Sometimes I lose my shit. Sometimes I read something that makes me remember how lucky I am.
As My Garden Grows
This tulip is outside our back door and it has now been joined by seven of its brothers and sisters. And that black plastic which I loathed? Gone! I plan on filling this space up with flowers, flowers and some more flowers. We might be eating canned beans by the end of the summer, but at least our yard will look good. Bwa-ha-ha-ha!
This is a small tree in our backyard. It was half expired when we moved in and we (by ‘we’, I mean Bubby) had to remove several branches, and we weren’t sure if the tree would survive the amputation. Now it is so pretty! Our neighbors told us it had beautiful flowers in the spring, but this is the first year it has looked this good.
The peonies are coming out of hibernation. These babies grow so fast! I think I took this picture two days ago and they are already doubled in size. Incidentally, I’ve always called peonies “pee-on-mes”. Sick, but true.
I have no idea what my recent fascination with the flowers in the backyard is all about, but I’m going with it. It’s that or poop talk. That’s all I’ve got right now.
This is a really pretty little tree on our side yard. I have no idea what anything is called. It has these gorgeous flowers in the spring and then dark red heart-shaped leaves in fall. I like it.
Bubby, I hope you like canned beans.
A Real Moment
I saw OMSH had joined the Real Mom ‘movement’ and decided to start my own flickr set celebrating moments of what? Insanity? Ineptitude? Survival?
More times than I’d care to admit, Arwyn enjoys her lunch in front of the computer or the tv. It keeps her busy and quiet for a few minutes so I can enjoy my own meal without the constant stream of “Sit down. Get back in your chair. Don’t do that with your fork. Eat your lunch.” etc, etc. This works as long as it is a game she can do by herself and I don’t have to rescue her.
Today’s Real Moment was brought to you by the letter P and the number 2.
Oh My
I just discovered another blog to add to my ever-growing bookmarks. Because really, who doesn’t have the time to read 500 blogs per day?!! I mean, its not like I’m doing anything but cleaning up bodily fluids anyway.
I’d seen OMSH referenced on other sites but had never checked her out before today. And wow, I’m really glad I did. She’s straight forward and funny and sounds like a person who would be great to get to know. And she loves Sonic, so how could I resist? I’m loving her Real Moms flickr set and have decided to attempt something along those same lines.
Tonight the girls and I are having a night on the town. And by girls, I don’t mean me and my ta-tas. I mean iMollie, our buddy BJ and myself. I think we’re all looking forward to it slightly more than may be appropriate, so here’s hoping it lives up to the hype.
And now I’m craving Sonic. The best birthday gift my brother-in-law BW ever gave me? A Sonic gift card. I’ll have a large coke, please.
Can You Dig It?
I made a list of everything we planted so I wouldn’t forget anything. I’m such a nerd, but we already knew that, didn’t we.
- Hyacinths (2) - one purple, one white
- Cosmos (seeds) - orange and yellow
- Zinnias (seeds) - multi-colored
- Daisy mix (seeds) - multi-colored
- Anemones - purple
- Dutch Iris - don’t recall
- Bearded Iris - black
- Phlox (2) - purple
- Viola (6 pack) - orange and purple
Here is the “tool” I was using before Monday. This is actually a promotional item given away at a library grand opening. Suffice to say it was not meant to be used to dig any actual holes, but I did anyway because that was pretty much all I had on hand.
My first actual gardening tool. Its amazing how much faster the digging went once I wised up.
My assistant’s tools. They don’t dig too well either, but they do fling dirt really well in all directions and water anything in sight.
Wilderness
We walked outside this morning to leave for errand-running and were thrilled to see a profusion of flowers had popped up overnight. This is the second year for these and they were one of the first things I planted in our yard. We have an odd assortment of things planted around, but most of them were put there by the previous owners. I was truly amazed that they lived and continue to do so, as it seems the multitude of squirrels living in the tree above these tulips like to dig up the bulbs. Perhaps I’m messing about in their favorite nut hiding place.
We have quite a few daffodils scattered around and I’m always glad to see them show their sunny heads. These are in our front yard, which is still a bit of a muddy mess from pulling out old shrubs last year.
Arwyn and I spent some time outside Saturday and today putting in a few new additions to the ‘flower garden’, which is quite an overstatement. We both ended up sweaty and covered in dirt, but I felt like I’d accomplished something and have the sore hands and arms to prove it.
And, lest you think the whole place is brimming over with beauty, we have a few of these as well. I actually don’t mind them and Arwyn likes to pick them, which keeps her from picking the actual flowers. Although, she seems to have moved on to a worm obsession and every time one was uncovered she would carry it around until it escaped her clutches.
The weather here has been amazing, and even a little frightening. 80+ degrees and running the a/c in March seems a tad scary, even though I am so glad for the sunshine and ability to be outside for long stretches.
Happy Monday.
Poop Fest ‘07
Who would have thought that a day that started out with this:
would end up like it has? A little time line of my day so far:
8:40 am Arwyn announces her awakening.. She has peed out of her pull-up and pooped. Clean her up, strip bed and changing table, get her dressed, start laundry.
9:00 am Eat breakfast. Watch Sesame Street.
9:30 am A friend calls, inviting us to the park. Throw on clothes and pack a bag.
10:00 am Arrive at park.
10:30 am Arwyn has to pee. Park bathrooms are LOCKED. Concept of squatting has not yet been introduced. Attempt to hold her above the ground behind a trashcan while she pees. Partially succeed.
10:45 am Get pooped on by a bird. I could not make this stuff up.
11:50 am Grab Arwyn’s feet to keep her from falling off playground equipment. Get kicked in chest and covered in wet sand.
11:00 am Arwyn has to pee again. Attempt behind-the-trashcan maneuver a second time. Succeed less than first time.
11:45 am Arrive home covered head to toe in wet sand and dirt. Strip Arwyn outside, try to shake off sand. Comb sand out of Arwyn’s hair and give her a much-needed bath. More laundry.
12:15 pm Make and eat lunch.
12:30 pm Arwyn pees in her pants on the recliner. Strip Arwyn, get her dressed again, strip recliner, scrub recliner, more laundry.
1:00 pm Play computer games with Arwyn.
1:15 pm While I am in the bathroom, Arwyn poops in her pants, then sticks her hand down her pants. I return to find her covered in poop. CUT OFF her clothes and throw them away. Give her another bath while she cries, throw away bath puff and get her dressed for third time. Clean tub, bathroom floor and chair she was sitting in. Take out trash. More laundry.
1:45 pm Put Arwyn down for a nap before I lose my mind.
2:00 pm Take a shower. Wonder when I can start drinking. More laundry.
Spunky
Tomorrow is our niece’s 14th birthday. Fourteen?!! How did this happen?? Our sweet little funny gal has grown up into a punk-loving awesome teenager(!), hence the stripes and skull. She lives in Texas and we don’t get to see her very often. She was in town last week for her Spring Break and we had a great time hanging out and shopping, of course.
Bubby and I feel that she is part of the reason we got together. She was here for a visit when the Bubs and I were working together. I saw what an awesome dude he was with her (great daddy-to-be) and he saw what a goofball I can be. She has always been, and definitely still is, a completely wonderful and very special person to us.
Happy B-day, Tay. We miss you.
Rainy Days and Mondays
Dreaming of what the weather was like last week (was it only last week?) when Arwyn and I spent the morning at the zoo with friends. I saw our first daffodil is finally blooming this morning, so I am holding out some hope for Spring’s return.
I finally got my cookie fix. I know you all were worried. Crisis averted.
Arwyn modeling her tiara and earrings (thanks, iMollie!) and trying out her new jump rope. They’re never too young for multi-tasking.
